Sometimes I go to the bathroom for peace and quiet and wish an escape hatch existed under the toilet lid. I lock the door to my oasis, and have privacy, plentiful water and a good seat to sit on. A bonus is the reading material near by. The fan buzzes loud enough to drown out sibling fighting occurring in the kitchen. It’s my slice of privacy that lasts about three minutes.
9:51AM
I enter the bathroom after a round of arguing over a purple ball. One of the kids finds me and peeks under the door.
“Whatcha doin’? Can I come in?” he asks.
“I am cleaning the bathroom, would you like to help?” I answer to silence and footsteps running away.
That buys me a few more moments of bathroom time. I sit enjoying my solitude, with only the toothpaste gunk and fingerprints on the mirror as company.
I thought once my kids were older and finished with temper tantrums I wouldn’t need to escape. When kids are under five, a mom needs a break to face another day. Only so many temper tantrums, diapers and band aid sticks can you handle. But as the kids get older, they are louder and sibling fights need a sound proof room. Private bathroom time becomes an absolute treasure.
9:52AM
“Mom, you in there?” Alpha asks.
“Mom, can we have a snack?” Bravo asks.
“Yes,” I answer while daydreaming about sand between my painted red toes, and an umbrella drink was cooling my palms.
“Um, Mom? Where’s the peanut butter?” They ask.
“In the pantry, second shelf,” I answer.
“Are we out of bread?”
“No.”
“We can’t reach the plates, can you help us?”
Silence. I employ the ‘I’ll be silent and they will forget where I am’ routine. It survives for 1 minute.
9:53AM
“Mommmmm! He’s using up all the peanut butter!”
Silence. I look around at my temporary holding place, it won’t last much longer.
“Mommmmm! He’s using up all the bread!”
“No, I’m not! He’s breathing on me!”
I turn the fan and the faucet on to high and drown out the arguing.
9:54AM
As I contemplate my next move, I hear nothing. There is no fighting, yelling or clanking of jars. Silence while your children are at home causes a fear only mothers understand.
My three minutes are up.
“I’m cleaning the bathroom, would you like to help?” CLASSIC! I am writing that down and using it from now on!!
So you mean to tell me that when they get older than 5 it doesn’t stop and I still can’t get any peace in the bathroom? Oh man…my 4 and 2 year old have NO respect for me and my privacy! If I don’t lock the door, they just barge right in and won’t leave until I finish doing what I’m doing! :-/ Stopping by from SITS.
Stopping by from SITS and OMG this was hilarious! I use the bathroom as my last sanctuary as well. It’s the only place where I can pretend to poop so I can read a magazine for five minutes without everyone hound dogging me.
Even though my kids are teens, I’m still struggling to find private bathroom time – my dog insists on following me EVERYWHERE! Loved meeting you from SITS! 🙂
Happy SITS Day! I think I have lived moments like this. I loved this post and am now following.
Ha! Yup as soon as it is silent, we know that’s when they can get into the most trouble. Great post!
have a great day!
My shower time is all mine. My kids often want to come in a and ask a question, but I’ve made it a no talking zone lol.
Happy SITS Day! My friend does this! She hides in the bathroom to avoid her son and to have a quiet phone conversation!
I’m following from SITS. Your bathroom escape is too funny. I used to do that when my kids where younger and it is definitely a great place to find peace…LOL
I’m having a FACEBOOK social hop. I’d love for you to hop on over, grab a button and link up your facebook.
http://mydailyphotojourney.blogspot.com/2012/12/facebook-social-hop.html
Have a crazy beautiful week!
You are the queen of catching a few minutes to yourself. I remember when my three kids were growing up, I don’t think I ever went to the bathroom alone. EVER. And, now with a dog, it’s the same thing. I go to the bathroom (of course I leave the door open now, there is no one home) And, you got it, I get hunted down by my dog. He casually walks by the door first, and then runs in, turns around so his butt is facing me and backs up, asking me to scratch him while I’m on the toilet! He’s hilarious! It’s his favorite time to get his butt and back scratched. What a riot! There is no hiding. Ever. Unless you live completely alone. Completely!
Congratulations on being the SITS featured blogger. My kids are grown and gone and have kids of their own now, but I still remember occasionally seeking sanctuary in the bathroom!
I am passing your blog onto my mom! Thank you for stopping by!
Yes! I often go to get a minute or two of peace in the bathroom… LOL. With a 5 and 3 year-old it really doesn’t last long, but enough to catch my breath and regroup.
Happy SITS day!
Love this! I don’t have kids but I have two younger brothers that are 8 and 10 and I know the feeling of that search for peace!
True, true! Thank you for stopping by!
Happy SITS day!
Happy SITS Day! I hope you had a great day. I love your blog; the whole premise behind it and everything. I especially like all of the various areas you delve into – gives me something to think about doing with my blog.
Again, I hope your Featured Blogger day was all that you thought it would be and more and…
Merry Christmas too!