Why Are Men Are Blind to Dust and Dog Hair…But Not Touchdowns?

Men see a touchdown pass fifty yards away, but can’t see dust in front of them. My husband is no different. Last Sunday, crumbs and lint were strewn across our living room floor. If I connected the lint dots, I’d end up with a picture of a hedgehog.

Did anyone else in the house notice the mess? Of course not.

The carpet had looked like that for a week…a week.

I hoped someone else; anyone else, would drag out the vacuum and suck up the hedgehog. Even our dog did nothing to help, he sniffed and moved on.

The days ticked by and the hedgehog grew a tail…

“Honey?” I yelled to my husband.

“Yes…” he answered with a pause.

“Have you noticed the dirt on the living room floor looks like a kids place mat at the burger barn?” I asked as he made his way down the stairs to the scene.

“Wow, it does look like a connect the dots game, wanna try it?” he quipped.

“It’s looked like this for a week.”

“A week?”

“Yes, a week.”

“Wow, I didn’t even notice.”

He didn’t even notice.

I pondered one of the greatest mysteries of men. How they can spot a bikini fifty yards away but can’t see dirt right in front of them? How can they notice a flag on the play before the referee throws the flag?

He leaned against the wall with a smirk on his face and I stood there with my hands on my hips.

The standoff lasted longer than I had hoped. But after over twenty years of marriage under my belt along with my muffin top. I had a decision to make.

This is one of those moments in a marriage where things either end in a fight or the day moves forward. Do I comment on the “I didn’t even notice” remark or let it go?

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What would you do in this situation?

A) Let the “I didn’t notice” remark go and chalk it up to men really shouldn’t be using vacuums anyway.

B) Pick a fight. Say, “Seriously, you don’t notice it as you walk over it every.single.day?” DING! Round one…

C) Simply ask, “Well, how about if you get the vacuum and help me clean all this up?”

D) All of the above after about a half hour fight.

Option C would be the logical, make a marriage therapist proud choice.