How do I get my husband to dress better? He dresses for work fine, but when we go out or on the weekends, he wears the same old clothes. Help! Asked by Debra – 20 something – Macon, GA
Maybe your husband doesn’t like to shop, or needs some assistance in finding items that are a current style and look good on him. Generally, shopping and attending to style (or lack thereof) are not on a man’s list of priorities. You could try buying your husband some suitable clothing options to see if he takes the bait and gradually starts wearing the new items. Don’t forget to mention how young, slim, and dashingly handsome he looks when he tries them on. Compliments and over-the-top flattery goes a long way with a man’s ego. Let him know that you appreciate it when he takes the time and effort to look nice when you go out together. But don’t make him give up his favorite worn-out sweat pants or beer logo t-shirt. A man’s got to have a few articles of ‘security clothing’ to hang on to. Marjorie – 30 something
OK, you want the honest answer or the PC answer? I have known wives who “lose” clothes in the wash, or “spill” grape juice on an especially horrible shirt. I’m going to presume you won’t have to resort to such tactics, but just be advised they do exist.
You can enclose the suggestion in a compliment: “Hon, can you wear the blue button-down shirt in the closet? You look so great in it, why don’t you wear that?” You can enclose the suggestion in love: “You know I love you hon, but you just don’t look good in those torn jeans. You should save them for yard work.” You can enclose the suggestion with an example: “You remember, hon, how you told me that that yellow shirt was not good for my coloring? I really appreciated that comment, so I wanted to tell you…”
Most likely, he is so happy to ditch his work clothes; he doesn’t want to come near them on the weekend. If the budget permits, the true compromise might be to find some comfortable clothes that happen to look good as well (my husband’s favorite: flannel-lined jeans. He calls them Stealth Pajamas). 2 hip t-shirts and some pressed loose jeans and you could both be happy. Amy C. – 40 something
Hey-I thought you were going to say that you were from the Northwest where I live! Dressing up is not wearing your Gortex and hiking boots. I would carefully suggest to your husband that “When we go out, I would like you to dress nicely for me. It makes me hot to see you in a nice shirt and slacks.” That may do the trick! Ann – 50 something
Lots of guys casual out on the weekends. So do lots of gals! Comfortable is in! However, dress codes have changed dramatically over the years and I would say if he is clean and dressed appropriately for the occasion, let it go. No tuxedos at ball games or sweats at the symphony, please! Some men get attached to their comfort clothes, just like we do with old bathrobes. I once knew a doctor who jogged every day in a very, very faded sweatshirt from his undergraduate days. Doesn’t hurt to compliment him when he does dress up a bit, either. Try buying him your favorite aftershave just to wear when you go out. Lets him know in a positive way you want him to make the time together special. If you come to your wit’s end and are ready for drastic measures, take his old clothes, wash them, and leave them in the machine wet. He’ll be forced to wear something else. Marge – 70 something