How Do I Survive the Holidays With Family?

survive the holidays with family

I am hosting a holiday dinner with family. Some members of my family let’s just say are not fun to be around. It’s stressful!  Any tips on how to survive the holidays with family? Asked by Moira – 30 something, Lubbock, TX

heleneTozierNothing like the holidays to take a bunch of people, throw them together and set the expectation that it should be a warm and loving dinner.  Those kind of dinners only appear in the magazine spread of Family Circle.  If it helps, everyone has family members that are critical, competitive, inappropriate, or just plain nuts.  It’s very hard to do but just focus on your kids, husband and you having a great time.  Let other people’s comments bounce like balls off of you and enjoy the dinner.  You mention it is some family members, which means not all.  Enjoy the “good” ones more and tell yourself to have fun.  If it gets bad, just take a break away from it all in another room or realize that it won’t last forever, just a few hours. Good luck and remember you are creating memories for your children, make them happy ones!  Megan – 30 something


heidiJones1Parties with family can be stressful, you are not alone!  I have found that inviting at least one close friend, to “help” you with the party, but is really there for you to have a witness to the crazy for discussion later.  Another idea is to plan something relaxing and enjoyable to you for the day following the party.  This might be a walk through your favorite park or neighborhood or it may be a pedicure.  Also a glass of wine can do wonders if that is your thing!  Hang in there and remember it is suppose to be a party for you as well.   Heidi – 30 something


annGlaserI think I understand a bit about what you are speaking about.  I have had to learn how to not get sucked into my mom’s craziness. Since I don’t know what stressful situation your family puts you in-this is a hard question to answer.  To me, the most important thing to remember is that you are hosting the event at your home.  So, arrange the dinner the way you like it.  Make sure it is special for you and your immediate family, and don’t worry about how others perceive it.  If they have a special way they like to do it-they can host the dinner at their home.  Perhaps it would help to give people a heads up about what you expect from them.  Is it to help with the food?  Tell them what you want them to bring.  Would it help to keep people entertained? Then let them know that games will be played after dinner and you hope they will join in the fun.  You can also add a little note about the wonders of Christmas with family and remind everyone in this small way of how you hope the day will go.  Most of all-have fun yourself.  The holidays are supposed to be joyous-so have joy inside and try to ignore the nay-sayers!  Ann – 50 something


margeGiuntoliIgnore it and have an eggnog or conjure up your favorite kind of liquid holiday cheer and keep that warm glow going all evening. You will be the most relaxed hostess ever!  Marge – 70 something