Dear Fairy Godmother,
I need you this week. Any chance you can wave your magic wand and pick up the clutter in my house? It’s growing at alarming rates and I’m the only one who notices it. My husband and kids blindly walk by the piles of stuff and I find myself picking up in their wake.
So what do you think? A little waving of the wand to help me out?
Cluttered in Suburbia
Dear Cluttered in Suburbia,
Sounds like you’ve had it with the clutter multiplying like mold. It takes a lot to keep up a home and family, especially when you feel you are the only one who is picking stuff up. Nothing like a crusty dirty dish on a coffee table to ruffle a woman’s feathers and cause her eyes to turn red. I wish I could use my wand and clean it up, but then I would have to do it every week for you. My wand only works one time for each type of wish. So, I will wave my wand and the following proclamation will appear on the fridge.
Mom’s Decree #23
Items left in places where they do not belong will be subject to a fine per object as of midnight tonight. Money will be collected by Mom at a rate of $1.00 per item picked up by her. Said items will have a 36 hour grace period before fines will apply.
My crystal ball is predicting a clutter free house soon.
Your Fairy Godmother